Run from her, as fast as you can
Marriage as a kind of entering into a contract on the part of two adults, full stop, and children only an afterthought, at best, is the new American cultural norm.
It is not sustainable. Indeed, that so many people now flee from the institution of marriage, recognizing its feeble state now that it is disconnected from the family and children, is evidence of what we lost in the redefinition.
It’s as though one redefined ‘reading’ to make decipering the meaning of the words printed on pages a subsidiary element of the act, perhaps present sometimes but not essential. Now you can read by simply sitting with a book in your hand with your eyes closed. In short order people recognize that there’s nothing there in the activity any longer, and they just stop even pretending to read.
Something recent on this topic: https://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2022/01/79728/